WOULD IT KILL YOU TO BE NICE?? WHAT, WAS YOUR FACE PARALYZED IN AN EXPLOSIVE CAR WRECK AND NOW YOU CAN’T SMILE?? DO YOU SUFFER FROM A RARE OCULAR VIRUS THAT PREVENTS YOU MAKING EYE CONTACT WITH ANOTHER HUMAN BEING?? DID YOUR FATHER BEAT THE HELL OUT OF YOU EVERYTIME YOU SAID A KIND WORD??
IS YOUR LIFE NOTHING BUT MISERY AND BITTERNESS?? DO YOU THINK I’M RESPONSIBLE FOR THE FACT THAT YOUR HUSBAND CHEATS? THAT YOUR CHILDREN ARE RUDE TO YOU? THAT YOUR BOSS IS A JERK?
DO YOU REALLY BELIEVE THAT EVERYONE ELSE IS TO BLAME FOR YOUR LOT IN LIFE? THAT EVERY MISFORTUNE WHICH COMES YOUR WAY IS CAUSED BY SOMEONE “OUT TO GET YOU?” DO YOU REALLY BELIEVE I AM THAT PERSON?
NEWSFLASH:
OH MY GOSH, YES!!! IT IS YOUR JOB TO FIND OUT IF THE ITEM I WANT IS IN STOCK! YOU ARE GETTING PAID TO HELP THE CUSTOMER! THAT’S WHY YOUR NAME TAG READS “Customer Service Representative!” READ IT! I’M NOT INTERRUPTING YOUR DAY, I AM YOUR DAY!
IT’S! WHAT! YOU! DO!
Shhhh. Shhhh. Shhhh. Shhhh.
Heeee. Heeeee. Heeee. Heeee.
Shhhh. Shhhh. Shhhh. Shhhh.
Heeee. Heeeee. Heeee. Heeee.
Shhhh. Shhhh. Shhhh. Shhhh.
Heeee. Heeeee. Heeee. Heeee.
Ah, screw it. I want the drugs.
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